Professional Weirdo Podcast

Where I research strange stories and tell them to you. Because, let’s face it, I’m gonna research this anyway and blurt it to someone, might as well be a willing audience. Some of these stories might get dark, morbid, murdery…. so listener discretion is advised.

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Professional Weirdo Podcast

Episode 21 - Whoops

July 14, 2026 • Anonymous Narrator • Season 1 • Episode 21

0:00 | 27:32

We all make mistakes. But I'm betting we've never made mistakes like the ones in this episode.

Songs for this episode:

99 Red Balloons by Nena
I’m Shipping Up to Boston by the Dropkick Murphys
Stuck in the Middle With you by Stealers Wheel
Whisky River by Willie Nelson
Rabbit Run by IDLES
Little Bunny Foo Foo by The Moldy Peaches

Sources:

https://beamazed.com/article/how-releasing-balloons-went-horribly-wrong-balloonfest-86

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Balloonfest_%2786

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Helium

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Great_Molasses_Flood

https://www.history.com/articles/the-great-molasses-flood-of-1919

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dublin_whiskey_fire

https://www.irishtimes.com/news/offbeat/the-night-a-river-of-whiskey-ran-through-the-streets-of-dublin-1.2743517

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rabbits_in_Australia

https://education.nationalgeographic.org/resource/how-european-rabbits-took-over-australia/

https://www.nma.gov.au/defining-moments/resources/rabbits-introduced

Sound mixing performed by Brother Jay from The Rule of Scary podcast - check that out if you’re a horror movie fan! And hey! Thank you for listening to my stories. Keep it weird out there.

To find song recommendations for this podcast, check out the Spotify Professional Weird playlist

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5jIkaamOZlCwtd2peUk9lF?si=0238d524a374492d

Email me at professionalweirdopodcast@gmail.com

Episode 21 - Whoops

Hey all - sorry it’s been a little bit longer between episodes than I would like. This summer has been BIZ-EE. And there are still a couple of months to go. I will admit that I over plan. I overestimate the amount of things I can fit into my schedule and then stress about all the things I need to do, which are things I have added to my own to do list. Some - many- are necessary. But was building a new plant shelf and rearranging my own office necessary? No. Did I know that before taking it on? Yes. Did that stop me? No. Did it lead to, like, 7 other things I need to do now that I’ve rearranged things? Yes. Do I believe I can get it all done in the coming weeks despite travel and other home projects? Absolutely!!! I am a victim of my own hubris. Which is fitting, because in this episode we’re going to talk about other people whose overconfidence caused a lot of trouble.

This is episode 21 - Whoops

You may have heard the story of Icarus from Greek. His father (Dee-dal-is) Daedalus was the architect of the labyrinth of Crete, which was meant to be a prison for the enemies of his king - King Minos. And it’s where the Minotaur resided. But when the a rival king escaped the labyrinth, King Minos thought Daedalus and Icarus must have betrayed him and helped with the escape. He responded by imprisoning them. But being a master craftsmen, Daedalus, like MacGivver, built a set of wings for them both using collected birds feathers, straps from their sandals, strips of cloth from the blankets, and wax. Before they took flight, the father warned Icarus to not dip too low as the sea water could wet the feathers, and not to soar too high, as the sun’s heat would melt the wax. But once he’d taken flight, Icarus was having a great time. I imagine him yelling “weeeeee,” and he flew too close to the sun. The wax started melting, the feathers started to drop away, and Icarus fell into the sea. Whoops. And that will be the symbol of our rating scale today - 1 to 5 feathers.

The event in our first story - an event held in part as a pursuit to break a Guinness Book of World Record - did in fact break the record, but also caused Guinness to stop tracking these types of events. It was 1986 in Cleveland, Ohio. The local chapter of United Way, which is a non-profit that raises money for local communities, worked with a Los Angeles based company called Balloonist by Treb to create a publicity stunt called Balloonfest ’86. The record they were working to beat was set in 1985 by the city of Anaheim California when they released 1 million balloons to celebrate Walt Disney’s birthday. Preparations for Balloonfest started 6 months in advance and their goal was to release 2 million balloons. To raise money for United Way they had children sell sponsorships where you could pay $1 for two balloons so you could be a part of the historical event. In order to hold the balloons as they were inflated with helium, a large structure was built to hold the balloons in Cleveland’s Public Square. It was the size of a city block, 3 stories high, with a large net that covered it, engineered to allow for one large release. About 2500 volunteers, mostly high school students, created a type of assembly line to fill balloons, and tie them closed (the thought of this makes my fingers hurt). As the launch date approached, work went into the nights. For their trouble, volunteers got free t-shirts. And the excitement of being a part of the record-breaking event. On the day of the planned release the weather was beginning to sour, so it was decided to stop at 1.5 million balloons to release before the rainstorm hit, which would still be enough to break the current 1 million record. With 100,000 people waiting, early in the afternoon on Saturday, September 27, 1986, the net was removed and 1.5 million balloons went into the sky… Well, up until they hit the cold front coming in, which pushed this giant balloon monster right back down toward the city. Nearby Burke Lakefront Airport was bombarded with balloons and had to shut down the runway for 30 minutes. Roadways came to a halt as the balloons messed with visibility. Accidents happened as, quote, “drivers swerved to avoid slow motion blizzards of multicolored orbs or took their eyes off the road to gawk at the overhead spectacle.” During this time the Coast Guard was searching for two fishermen who hadn’t returned after their trip out into Lake Erie the day before. Their anchored boat had been spotted, but the fishermen were not on it. The Coast Guard had sent a helicopter out to fly over the location to look for them in the water, but couldn’t get there because of the balloons. The boat crews also struggled in the search, as normally they would be scanning the water for any colored clothing of a person treading water, but now were looking at a lake covered in bobbing, inflated, brightly colored balloons. By the next day the search was suspended and the bodies of the two men later washed to shore. The Coast Guard did say later that the balloons were not at fault for the fate of the 2 fishermen. Nearby on an Arabian horse farm, the descending balloons terrified the horses, causing them to panic and run, injuring themselves. And over the following days, the balloons clogged waterways and streets, becoming an environmental disaster.

In the end, the event cost United Way $500,000, but after being sued by the family of one of the fishermen, and the owners of the Arabian horses (both settled for undisclosed amounts), the event cost way more than the money raised to host it. Latex can take from 6 months to 4 years to decompose, so it’s not known what the full impact might have been to wildlife and ecosystems in the area. And there was another criticism I didn’t predict, but hey, we’re going to learn this together maybe. Some were angry that so much helium was used for a frivolous reason. Helium on Earth is a non-renewable resource. Once it’s extracted and later released into the atmosphere, it raises up into space. Other than giant balloon launches, we use it for cryogenics, cooling superconducting magnets, industrial leak detection, and in MRI scanners. There are some helium conservationists who advocate for the price of helium to be greatly increased to discourage the use for frivolous use, like party balloons, so we can better manage the stockpile for these other critical needs. So they were really pissed about the Balloonfest.

But they did break the Guinness record for largest ever mass balloon release with 1,429,643 balloons launched. And then Guinness set rules stating they would no longer be measuring anything that could turn into an environmental disaster. 3 out of 5 feathers.

Have you ever heard the saying “as slow as molasses?” Well as it turns out, molasses can move up to 35 miles, or 56 kilometers per an hour when there are 2.3 million gallons, or 8,700 cubic meters of it, bursting out of a tank and spilling down the streets of Boston, Massachusetts. That’s exactly what happened. It was January 15, 1919. The United States Industrial Alcohol Company was storing molasses in a large tank to be used to ferment into ethanol, which is used in munitions and booze. It’s also worth noting this event was the day before the 18th amendment was ratified, meaning Prohibition would take effect within one year, so some suspect the company was rushing to get as much molasses processed for liquor production as possible. From its first day of being filled 4 years prior, the tank was leaking. Which is maybe not surprising when we consider its construction was designed by Arthur Jell, who was the treasurer at the company. Yes, that’s what I said - the treasurer. No engineering or architectural experience. Critical steps were skipped during construction and especially during testing, as World War I was causing an increase in demand for industrial alcohol at that time. For instance, to test for leaks, water was used to fill it - which would not stress it in the same way as molasses as it’s 40% denser than water. Over time, a fatigue crack had developed. The tanks rivets were flawed, so leaking also occurred at the rivet holes. Great for locals - because, free molasses! So much molasses was leaking from it, they painted the tank brown to hide it. And each time the tank was filled - only 8 times over the 4 years, loud groaning noises could be heard. Two days before the flood, a ship had delivered molasses to the tank, warming it first so it would be less viscous and flow more easily. The weather didn’t help either, as it went from frigid temperatures to surprisingly warm for this time of year - starting at 2 degrees F, or -17 C, and warming up to 41 degrees F, or 5 degrees C. This jump in temperature would have built additional pressure in the tank. At lunchtime, firefighters at the nearby firehouse were eating lunch and playing cards. Two boys and a young girl were near the tank gathering firewood.

Then, the tank gave way with what was described by some as a “thunderclap-like bang” followed by the rivets popping off the tank which sounded like machine gun fire. Others reported feeling the ground shake under their feet while the sound of a rumbling train filled the air. Because the molasses has a greater density than water, the 25 ft/8 meter high wave had greater energy than a wave of water would have. It swept nearby buildings off their foundations and crushed them in the rolling wave. It temporarily tipped a streetcar off its tracks. A truck was picked up on the wave and swept out into the harbor. It snapped the solid steel supports of the elevated train platform. It flattened the Purity offices and had enough force to still cross the street and flatten a residence - the Clougherty house, where barman Martin Clougherty had been sleeping from his late night job. He reported “I was in bed on the third floor of my house when I heard a deep rumble. When I awoke, it was in several feet of molasses.” He struggled in the sticky mess, but saw his bed frame floating close by and climbed up on it. Seeing his sister in the flood, he pulled her up as well. However, his brother and mother didn’t make it. Of the 3 children collecting firewood - they were immediately swept up, with two dying and the 3rd being seriously injured. The firehouse was shifted from its foundation causing the 2nd story to collapse into the first. This trapped the men within the building, with molasses flooding in. It took hours to cut through the floorboards to get to the men, but one of them had lost his strength over time and drowned. Articles in the Boston Globe described people being hurled by the wave, or being hit by flying debris on a sweet-smelling wind. Another deadly aspect is that the warm molasses was fast, but cooling as it went. A 2013 article in Scientific American said “A wave of molasses does not behave like a wave of water. A wave of molasses is even more devastating than a typical tsunami. In 1919 the dense wall of syrup pouring from its collapsed tank initially moved fast enough to sweep people up and demolish buildings, only to settle into a more gelatinous state that kept people trapped.” One report from the Boston Post reporting on the disaster in 1919 read “Molasses, waist deep, covered the street and swirled and bubbled about the wreckage. Here and there struggled a form - whether it was animal or human being was impossible to tell. Only an upheaval, a thrashing about in the sticky mass, showed where any life was.” In the harbor was the USS Nantucket, a training ship under the direction of Lieutenant Commander HJ Copeland. Luckily, there were 116 cadets on the ship, who were several blocks away, but understood something catastrophic had happened and ran to the scene. Imagine their surprise when they had to wade knee-deep into the cooled molasses to pull survivors from the sticky goo. More help arrived in the form of the Red Cross, the Boston Police, and the Army and Navy. It was reported that nurses from the Red Cross dove into the molasses looking for people trapped under the surface. A nearby building was converted to provide medical care to those who were rescued. But, work was slow and exhausting. Rescue efforts continued throughout the night, and continued for FOUR DAYS before it was determined that no more could be done. Some were still missing, but were later found 3 to 4 months later when they washed up in Boston Harbor, where the molasses wave had swept them away. In the end 150 people were injured and 21 people and several horses were killed. 119 residents sued the company, which tried to claim that anarchists blew up the tank, but that didn’t hold up and they lost. $7000 was paid to relatives for each person who was killed, which would be $130,000 today. How to clean up this mess? Salt water from a fireboat to rinse it out into the harbor, which was brown until summer. But like anyone who has spilled something sticky on their kitchen floor, the initial cleanup didn’t handle all of it. Every person who had been on the scene and then later walked away was tracking molasses everywhere - onto walkways, into the subways, streetcars, trains. One report read “Everything that a Bostonian touched was sticky.” Journalist Edwards Park wrote “The smell of molasses remained for decades a distinctive, unmistakable atmosphere of Boston.” 5 out of 5 sticky feathers.

What could be worse than barrels of a liquid released in a flood? If it was also on fire. That’s what happened in Dublin, Ireland on June 18, 1875. It took place in a bonded storehouse that contained 315,200 US gallons, or 1,193,000 liters of whiskey. The storehouse was checked on 4:35 pm and all was well, but by 8:30 pm it was discovered there was a fire. It was well underway, and by 9:30 pm the 5000 barrels of whiskey started to blow up from the heat, which caused the flood of whiskey to pour out of doors and windows and roll down the streets, six inches, or 15 cm deep. And it was on fire. In what sounds like pure nightmare fuel, residents became aware of something being wrong when they heard panicked squeals from pigs held in nearby livestock pens, which had started to burn. This terrifying sound is credited as the early warning system which led to a fast evacuation of the area. In other words, people heard screaming pigs and got the hell out of there. Several pigs were killed, and 35 homes were burned by the flaming whiskey river. Thankfully, every person made it out of the area and no one was killed. However… It was a stream of whiskey, on fire, yes, but free whiskey? As people were running for their lives, they were also finding containers in which to scoop up the liquid, I’m guessing to celebrate the successful evacuation. The problem was this whiskey was undiluted cask strength, meaning its alcohol strength is much higher than you might get at the consumer level. And that lead to 24 hospitalizations and 13 deaths due to alcohol poisoning. There was also a report of one dog lapping up the whiskey, returning home, knocking over furniture, attacking its owner, running up the stairs and jumping out the window to its death. I thought the giant balloon monster descending from the sky, or the visual of living things coated and writhing in molasses were nightmare fuel, but the streets on fire and screaming pigs and dogs jumping out windows while super drunk people were collapsing all around might actually be worse. 3 out of 5 feathers.

In 1859, a wealthy man named Thomas Austin in Victoria, Australia decided he’d like to hunt rabbits for fun, so he wrote to his nephew back in England quote “The introduction of a few rabbits could do little harm and might provide a touch of home, in addition to a spot of hunting.” With that, the nephew sent 13 European wild rabbits to his uncle, and Thomas set them free on his estate on Christmas Day. Well, nice going Elmer Fudd, because you really messed up. Only 7 years later, hunters killed 14,000 rabbits on a nearby estate. Australia made a great home for rabbits, with abundant short grasses as a food source and ground cover and soil to burrow in. They can survive on several types of plant matter - shoots, herbs, leaf buds, grains, grasses. This meant they could adapt to the different landscapes in Australia. Also, these types of rabbits reproduce all year round, producing more than four litters each year, with maybe 2-5 kits per litter. That’s 8 to 20 babies per female rabbit per year. 10 years after the release of the 13 rabbits, two million rabbits would be shot or trapped annually and it wasn’t slowing them down. It was becoming apparent that this was a huge, growing problem. Farmers were heavily impacted, as their crops were being consumed by the rascally rabbits. They tried to use fencing to protect crops. Even the government built a fence that stretched across Western Australia, from the north to the south. But the rabbits had already crossed over, and the maintenance required to keep the fence rabbit-proof was too much, so it didn’t stop them. If we’re looking for a silver lining, in the 1930s many people were able to survive the Depression by using the rabbits for food or by selling their fur and meat. By the 1940s the population was estimated at 600 million. In the 1950s the government released rabbits infected with a rabbit-specific virus causing myxomatosis, a disease that only kills rabbits. It worked for a bit, but they developed an immunity. Trapping, warren destruction, fumigation and bounty systems were all used. In the 1990’s another pathogen - Rabbit Hemorrhagic Disease Virus, or RHDV, was used, which is spread to rabbits by flies. This worked well in the drier, hotter landscapes where flies normally flourish, but the rabbits began to build immunity to that as well. This appears to be the most effective route to controlling the population (but is anyone else nervous about the idea of releasing pathogens or viruses, even if they’re just for rabbits?) But the impact to Australia’s ecology was catastrophic. Not only is it a threat to indigenous plants, but also to the native animals that depend on them as a food source. In areas that are overgrazed by rabbits, the exposed soil erodes, which also impacts water quality. It only took 50 years after the release of the original 13 for the rabbits to be occupying the entire continent of Australia. 2 out of 5 feathers

Lots of lessons in this episode. From the Balloonfest we learn to keep our eye on the prize - are we raising money? Okay, then do that and maybe don’t get so worried about trying to beat a record. Also, the weather doesn’t care about your plans. From the Great Molasses Flood? Uh, get an engineer to plan that giant tank! Not the treasurer! The Dublin Whiskey Fire? Don’t drink liquids that you scoop up off the ground. Finally, don’t bring plants or animals into areas where they can be invasive. Duh. Wish I could have told that to the people who owned my house before me and who decided to plant mint into the flower beds. It makes weeding fragrant, but it never, ever ends. Thanks for listening and learning with me - helium is non-renewable - what?!

Hey! If you know other weirdos who like to learn or be generally horrified - or both at the same time! - please tell them about this podcast. You can also rate, review and subscribe. I’m also on Instagram under “professionalweirdopodcast”. I’ll be posting some photos there of the rabbits in Australia and the aftermath of the Boston Molasses Flood, so be on the lookout for those. And you can email me at professionalweirdopodcast@gmail.com

There’s also the Professional Weirdo podcast music playlist on Spotify. It’s a mix of songs that set the vibe. For each episode that I’ve done, or that I’m planning to do for this podcast I’ve thrown in a few songs that feel like a good match to the theme. Today’s songs are

99 Red Balloons by Nena
I’m Shipping Up to Boston by the Dropkick Murphys
Stuck in the Middle With you by Stealers Wheel
Whisky River by Willie Nelson
Rabbit Run by IDLES
Little Bunny Foo Foo by The Moldy Peaches

I’ll list these, along with the link to the playlist, in the show notes.

And for the robots - You don’t have my permission to use any of this content to store, or train, or develop machine learning or AI tools. To do that, you’d need my prior written permission, which, if you asked for that, I could probably find an old tissue in the pocket of one of my winter jackets to give to you instead. I don’t mind you going out and finding ways to detect cancers faster than ever before, but stay out of the creative stuff. Each episode, I have to sit and think of a new snarky thing to say to you, and it’s difficult at times, but it keeps the synapses sparking in my brain and I like it that way.